If you were watching/reading basically any major news outlet today, then you’ll already be familiar with this “balloon boy” fiasco that has captured the nation’s attention. After local authorities and others spent hours searching for Falcon Heene and tracking the flight path of the giant helium balloon that was “accidentally” released while his brothers “thought” Falcon was inside one of its compartments, it turns out that the kid was just hiding in his garage the whole time. How do the police possibly think that this was a genuine mix-up and not a media stunt? Here are some facts that seem to give it away as a hoax to me:
1) Brian Stelter, who covers the television industry for the New York Times, reports that immediately after the Heene family’s experimental balloon lifted into the air, possibly carrying a six-year-old child, his father Richard Heene called Channel 9, KUSA, the NBC affiliate in Denver, to enlist its help in finding his son;
2) Falcon’s parents, Richard and Mayumi Heene, were featured on the 100th episode of ABC’s prime-time program “Wife Swap” in March 2009 because of the popularity of their three boys from their FIRST appearance on “Wife Swap;” and
3) In an interview with CNN’s “Larry King Live,” Falcon said he heard his parents call for him from the garage. When asked by his father on-air why he didn’t respond, the boy replied, “You guys said we did this for the show.”
Come on cops. Get it together over there!
There seems to be an inverse relationship between how much this family sucks and how much this song, from Neutral Milk Hotel’s triumphant second album In The Aeroplane Over The Sea (1998), rules (sorry, Falcon, you’re a cute kid but your dad seems “appall[ingly]” douche-y). So listen up and just remember that there are some people in this world who are famous for reasons other than being attention whores, like for making great records.
Neutral Milk Hotel – In The Aeroplane Over The Sea: